Plutôt vomir que faillir

Creation November 2022

Plutôt
vomir
que
faillir

I have this bitter memory from high school of not understanding what was happening to me. Of facing head-on, the codes of a new society without a helmet on. Of experiencing a thousand forms of violence and loss within the confines of my body and the schoolyard. My words didn’t mean anything, I no longer remember what I thought back then or who I was, and if I look twenty years back, I wished I could have put words and images on my life that matched my emotions at that time. I would have wanted to be certain not to miss the turn that leads me to who I was; I would have wanted my identity’s journey to be better marked.

As a young new adult (19 years old), and for twelve years, I went back to school with Entrées de Jeu, a company specializing in theatrical debates. We performed in front of hundreds of students, discussing topics related to emotional life, violence, the risks associated with psychoactive substances and screens. Thousands of performances in detention rooms, in the school library, in cafeterias, collaborating with the school nurse and student counsellors.

Today, I feel that my medium as a performer, which I once believed was reserved for adults of a certain social class, is the right place. To describe the developing intimate, the stormy intimate, to ask the difficult questions, both gentle and violent images, to talk about an individual and collective body. Vomiting as a necessary and visceral rejection, a defence against something we can't digest.

Vomiting against an established order, against a framework we didn't choose. I want to talk about first times too early and too late, pimples on the forehead, hair everywhere and nowhere, breasts growing too much and not enough, gender in reverse, learning about one's body, impossible communication with the family, a family with an unnamed past, a broken sibling relationship, silence, silence, silence, coming out, our parents' faith, faith in oneself, dependencies and taking risks, digital activist commitment, thought outbursts, emotional outbursts, rejection of everything.

Staging Rébecca Chaillon
Texts by Rébecca Chaillon and the actors
With Chara Afouhouye, Zakary Bairi, Mélodie Lauret and Anthony Martine
Dramaturgy and collaboration in staging Céline Champinot
Assistant staging Jojo Armaing
Scenography Shehrazad Dermé
Sound design Élisa Monteil
Light design and general management Suzanne Péchenart
Creation of a network-video set up Arnaud Troalic
Light design Myriam Bertin
Sound design Jenny Charreton
Stage management Marianne Joffre
Production and Development director Mara Teboul
Lyrics and song compositions «Tout mon sang», «Et si je l’étais ?», «Poil», and «Putréfaction» Mélodie Lauret

This creation was supported by the permanent and freelance team of the CDN (National Drama Center) in Besançon, including:
Costume creations Florence Bruchon
Set construction David Chazelet, Antoine Peccard and Thomas Szodrak
Cutlery creation by Rémy from the company Savoir-Fer
Acknowledgments Macha Robine, Sandra Calderan, Alexia and Lyes Bairi, Corinne Lauret, Mélanie Charreton, Hélène Barillot
Rébecca Chaillon is represented by L’Arche, theatrical publisher agency. www.arche-editeur.com
Production Compagnie Dans le ventre
Co-production CDN Besançon Franche-Comté (Executive producer of the creation and the first tour 22-23), TPR – Centre neuchâtelois des arts vivants – La Chaux-de-Fonds, Maison de la Culture d’Amiens, Le Maillon Théâtre de Strasbourg – Scène européenne, Théâtre du Beauvaisis – Scène nationale, Le Phénix – Scène nationale de Valenciennes, Centre dramatique national Orléans/Centre Val-de-Loire, Le Carreau du Temple – Cultural and sports facility of the City of Paris, La Manufacture – CDN Nancy – Lorraine.
With the support of the DRAC Hauts-de-France as part of the creation help. With the support of the Région Hauts-de-France.
Résidence, Ferme du Buisson / Scène nationale de Marne la Vallée